Join me each week for a series called I’VE GOT THIS FRIEND where I’ll share the funny stories about the people in my life! There are a lot of them and they’re so funny you’ll think I’m making them up, but they’re legit…I promise!
THE ROOMBA + DOG DIARRHEA
Remember when the roomba first came out? Everyone was obsessed with being able to turn it on and leave the house, only to return with a perfectly vacuumed home! THE CONVENIENCE! THE EASE!
Well, I’ve got this friend who bought one right off the bat. She had young kids and hairy dogs who she was always cleaning up after. The idea of being able to turn the roomba on while she was running errands was just too good to deny. So she bought it.
And just like everyone else…SHE TURNED SMUG.
C’mon, if you’re a roomba owner, you know you’re smug, too!
Until the day she came home and SHE WASN’T SO SMUG.
She opened the door and noticed something was a little different with her cream colored berber carpet.
There were zig zags and swirls everywhere…all over the first floor. And she just stood in the entryway trying to figure out what she was seeing.
Was it paint? Was it mud? Did the kids get into something?
And then she smelled it.
And she just knew.
She dropped everything and ran into the house.
And she saw it…
A GIANT WET SHADOOBY in the corner by the dog door.
Sure enough, the roomba rolled right on through that shit (pun intended) and tracked it ALL OVER THE HOUSE.
She didn’t know if she should scream or cry, so she chose to laugh and so laugh she did.
And she never used the roomba again.
The end.
Lol…your such a good story teller. Total laugh post!
Ha! Thanks, Lala!!!
I am going to LOVE this series. LOVE it. Also, since I don’t have a dog (or a cat), I think I might look into a Roomba.
And then you can become one of the smug ones! : )
I love your new series! And I am so glad this story did not happen to me.
That is just plain horrific. But since it didn’t happen to me… also HILARIOUS!
Yeah when shit happens literally often all you can do is laugh. Wow
I know, right?!?!
Bwahaha! I’m toying with the idea of getting a roomba, but there is definitely something about not being in control of it that scares me. And now you’ve just proven my point.
I laughed so hard at work that my co-workers insisted I tell them what was so funny.
Ha! Glad it made ya chuckle!!!
SHUT UP! THIS DID NOT HAPPEN
it did! wouldn’t you DIE?!?!
Hilarious! Warning heeded.
It’s definitely something that I’ve never forgotten!!! : )
SHADOOBY made me snort my lunch through my nose.
WHOOPSIE! : )
OH. My. Bejesus. I guess it was a good excuse to replace that carpet with some hardwoods!
VOM/Awesome.
I just DIED. (I don’t even know how I’m typing this because I’m DEAD.)
This is as horrible. HORRIBLE. And awesome.
The perfect cocktail party story.
Wow. Just wow.
OH man. I just read this aloud to my husband and his bro-friend and laughed so hard.
Confession. I am a smug roomba owner. They really are amazing for maintenance cleaning. Worse than that…I’m also a smug Rainbow Vacuum owner.
…I’m probably going to have nightmares about doggy doo doo now. Thanks Jen!